Milkmaid

 I have made the decision to breast feed.  This is something I had decided from the get go.  I knew it was going to be difficult, and that there would be some challenges - but I had no idea how frustrating it would be.

As those of you that have been following my blog know, Peanut was born 6 weeks early.  While in the NICU she was fed my breast milk via feeding tube.  I started pumping breast milk right from the start and it has been going really well.  It wasn't that bad when she was still in the hospital because I had 4 hours to spare (8 times a day for a half hour each session). Sure it was difficult to fit them in - but I did it.

Now that she's home I'm finding it very hard to keep up with the pumping and take care of her at the same time.  My doctor said I could breast feed her up to 4xs a day but she is not doing so well with it.  Sometimes she'll latch on and eat with no problems - but most times she'll latch on and then just hang out.  She won't suck, but basically just lays there with my breast in her mouth.  I've tried changing her diaper right before, undressing her to wake her up a bit, waiting until she's really hungry - but nothing seems to be working.  I'm frustrated.  I want to be able to breast feed her.  I don't want to pump, put it in a bottle, then feed her.  Let's cut out the middle man so to say!

Last night is a prime example.  P woke up at 4:30am to be fed.  I went downstairs, prepared a bottle of breast milk that I pumped earlier in the day and fed her.  If I was just breast feeding, that would have been it.  But nope, I had to then put her down, go get all my pumping supplies ready, and start the 30 minute process of pumping. Right as I started, she started crying...so I had to figure out a way to hold her on a pillow on my lap so I could rock her while I was pumping.  Since I have the pump attached to me I have to keep her at arms length.  So I finally got her settled and then I had to just sit there until it was done.  Then I had to put her down, label the bottles with the date/time, record it in my book, and clean the supplies for next time, and bring the bottles downstairs to put in the fridge (actually Sean did that for me).  It's quite a process.  I was actually on the verge of tears last night because I was just so frustrated by the whole process. If I could breastfeed, I could just feed her, rock her for a bit, and put her back down. Grr.

I've called 4 lactation consultants so far.  The first one said she'd stop by on Saturday for her feeding between 5-6pm.  Finally at 6pm with her not showing up or answering her phone I fed her myself.  At 6:30pm she called and asked if she was "too late" because her last appointment went too long.  Um, yeah lady...I had to feed my baby who was starving by that point!  The other 3 that I've called haven't even called me back!

I don't know what to do.  I'll try to call the other 3 again tomorrow and hope that one of them calls me back.  I want to be successful with breast feeding.  Especially since Peanut is premature, I want to give her any additional health benefits that I can...but I don't know if I can keep up the whole pumping and feeding her forever.  Most days I can only get 7 pumps in and I'm afraid that I won't be able to keep up with her needs.  So far it isn't a problem but as she grows she's going to want more to eat.

If anyone has suggestions, I'd greatly appreciate it.  In the meantime I'll just keep trying to get a lactation consultant to return my call and help me down this difficult road.

*update - since I wrote this, I spoke with one of the LC's.  She is going to call me back within a 1/2 hour to schedule a visit either today or tomorrow.  Hopefully she'll start me on the road to successful breastfeeding!
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

  © Blogger template Shush by Ourblogtemplates.com 2009

Back to TOP